I am a Blessed Crone Even in Chaos

Our world is filled with chaos; with many people and critters that don't have basic needs met. It is hard to hear, to witness the suffering.
At one time, actually for many years, I thought I had to take care of everything and everyone. That's an insane thought, isn't it? It was unconscious, yet a driving force.
Now, I know I'm not in charge-don't want to be, actually. I KNOW in my bones, no matter how hard life is that there's a benevolent force, I call God. It is a relief to know I'm not responsible for everything. I also know God is there for anyone who wants that ever faithful loving relationship.
I listen and care. I do have responsibility for the life of others- my decisions affect others.
I let the latest news in. I hear and feel it. I look at myself with the truth of life. I know I can only do what's possible in my little world. I decide what I can do to make a difference in an hour or day in someone's life.
Within that decision I know I have to care for myself.
When I care for myself, it becomes a healthy boundary. In upholding that, care of myself, boundary, I can give to another. I can receive from another. There's mutual well being and joy.
Today, for care of myself, a friend and I walked in the light rain. We shared our stories of the past weeks when we hadn't been together. We were laughing within those stories. We laughed out of gratitude and amazement for a life-giving happening. The happening was I experienced the unexpected gift of written words and pictures of love in a dear booklet tied in purple string. That unexpected thoughtful gift was one that an adult child might express at the funeral of her mother. Instead it was written for today, to see and hear today in celebration of 80 years as a woman, the mother.
It was an honest sharing of words about life put together with great love. When I read the booklet with the giver, at her request, we laughed and laughed at the joy of surviving and even thriving. I said, "What a gift to get this while I'm above ground." We laughed.
My friend and I savored and laughed in loving amazement too.
What a joy amid chaos.
Where is your joy in the chaos today?

You can write me at www.blessedcrone@earthlink.net

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